30 May 2006

This isn't Good-bye

Tonight I went to one of my favorite blogs, Femivist, because I knew the writer had taken some time away and hoped to be back soon. Instead of a new post, I found a closed site with this note:
Hi Friends,

I have made a difficult decision. I am going to stop updating this blog. I plan to leave it up as a resource in hopes that it might bring hope and healing to others. Writing and maintaining this blog has certainly brought hope and healing to me.

I began blogging in January. Five months later I can say that this experience has been a wonderful one. I have found fellow activists all over the world. I have connected with survivors all over the world. I am honored to have been influenced by each and every one of you.

In many ways I am turning a new page in my life story. The past five months have been necessary for me. I needed a space to test out my voice. I needed the safety of blogging, the safety of deleting hurtful comments, the safety of using my laptop to begin to express emotions, philosophies and questions that had been stirring inside of me for years. I used this blog as a platform to establish a safe place for myself and my readers. A place where survivors could tell their stories and find people who would say: "I believe you. I'm sorry. I've been there too." I am overwhelmed by those of you who have come forward to share and support. I cannot thank you enough.

You all have given me the courage to be myself. Knowing that there is a community of people out there who are like me is the best gift I could have ever gotten. And now, with that strength, I am ready to once again pick myself up off the floor and continue fighting. I know that in some ways blogging is a tool to fight the patriarchy, but I want to be out and about in my community. Living & enjoying life while staying true to my activism ideals.

So, it is with great love and admiration for all of you that I walk away from this community. I might drop back in from time to time. I am of course always available by email. And if I find myself on the floor again, I will know where to turn. But for now, my fingers are tired of doing the talking.

Thank you for allowing me to grow. You have each played a pivotal role in my development as a person and as a survivor of sexual violence. I truly hope we win our war one day. And I believe we will. I'll keep playing my part. I trust each of you will as well.

If you are finding this blog for the first time, welcome. This is a safe place. Please treat it as such. I believe you. And I believe in you. Feminism is nothing without activism propelling it forward. Don't get bogged down in the inner battles. Don't allow yourself to become discouraged. Don't forget to laugh.

Remember there is beauty all around. There is reason to smile.

Much love,

I can't express how much Lauren's writing has meant to me in only the short time I've been reading her site. She is a strong, brave woman, and she is a survivor. Her work touched a lot of people in a very short period of time, and I was part of that group. I wish her nothing but the best and hope she knows that many of us are still out here, surviving together in spirit if not in words.


Blogger Adam R. said...

It is blogs like Lauren's (and yours) that constantly remind me of how powerful the written word, be it in a book or displayed on a monitor, can truly be.

Browsing through Lauren's archives (I admit, I knew nothing of her site until I found it through you), I felt the full spectrum of human emotion run through me - in a span of, oh, 60 seconds. I'm definitely going to give her site a much more thorough look tonight. I just wish I could write even one post in my blogging career with an 1/8 of much power as any of hers.

It's just sad that she's ready to hang up her hat after a mere five months. At least in that short amount of time, she gathered a great resovoir of strength, courage, and perseverance.

Lauren, mai das Universumgeben Sie ewige Liebe und Energie!

(My German is rusty, so I apologize if I just butchered it).

1:02 AM  
Blogger hexyhex said...

I nearly cried when I read that. :(

3:04 AM  

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